Hustle Castle’s Extremely Confusing Ads (Badads 4)

The ads say 18+ but in the App Store it says 9+ LMAO they really out here clickbaiting

"I'm Danny! The sexiest rat on all of youtube"
Lady Ratatoing rats: *AM I A JOKE TO YOU*

The girl in hustle castle didnt grow thiccer, that bish was just *COMPRESSED* .

Honestly the saying "You dont belong to god" seems a combination of creepy and inspiring.

Me: *blocks hustle castle*
Ad: “Hahaha, you think you can just dispose of me like a battery?”

“The sexiest rat”
*impling other rats are sexy*

That dragon looked like a proud father

"I fear it's too heinous to say" I love how Danny occasionally lapses into this Shakespearian vocabulary, but does so in the most chill and natural way to the point where you hardly even notice he's doing it.

“Gonna cry? Gonna piss your pants maybe?” IM SCREAMING-

These look like the porn ads that come up when you illegally watch a movie

I hope Josh is in a better place and in a healthy relationship. He for sure deserved better

Nothing will ever top the ad I saw that said, “Beat this game and you’re legally allowed to leave.” Leave from what? Why can’t I leave now? Have I always been your prisoner, game developer?

Throughout all the ads: THIS IS NOT A CHILDREN’S GAME!
8:58 On the App Store: Age 9+

Danny: I’m the sexiest rat on KRplus
Ratatoing: 😭

Theres something so horrifyingly real about that one ad where the ex is talking down to whoevers playing that picture game and insulting them while also saying verbally how the person playing will never get rid of them bc they have full control over this person. Even for a stupid ad for a not great game it somehow paints a clear image of abuse

I once got an add that had holes eating stuff called “black hole io” and for some reason the caption for it was “I can’t reach pink DINO”

No one:
Polygons ad: *YØÛ'RË NØT GØD'S, JØSH. YØÛ'RË MĪÑË.*

when you just wanna solve puzzles but you accidentally download an abusive relationship :(

As someone who knows a woman I can confirm that as they grow up they turn from Post Malone into Jessica Rabbit

I may never play the game, but I'll certainly never forget the woman sternly denying Josh's religion

Nobody:
Crappy mobile game ads: if you play our game you are legally allowed to commit mass murder

Someone: blocks hustle castle
Hustle castle: *evil laugh* You fool, I have 70 ALTERNATIVE ACCOUNTS

5:40
Bard: "I ROLL TO SEDUCE"
DM: *sigh*

I’m was trippin the whole video because when I look at his shirt, his eyes are grey, and when I looks at the greg sign, his eyes are blue.

Hustle castle: not for children!
Also hustle castle: for ages 9+.

Bravo to the dragon for stepping up and being there at the birth of his children

10:08
are they calling us a sock or did they spell suck wrong???

i think this is even funnier when you think about a room of business men deciding that this was gonna be their marketing strategy

Appreciate the personalized greeting

“I would like to be distressing the damsel.”
- Danny Gonzalez, 2019

It’s like this girl just kidnaps him and it’s just
“I’ll let you take one thing, and that’s this mobile game.”

Fun fact! It actually says that the minim age for Hustle Castle says 9+ when it literally says “NOT KIDS GAME 😈🔞”
So they’re driving away their potential customers

“you’re mine, josh
not god’s,
not your girlfriend’s,
not your so-called pastor’s,
and _definitely_ not god’s!”

Me in any social situation:
"Maybe if I over-analyze this it will start to make sense!"

The best ad I ever saw was a mobile game ad but instead of text like "I can't reach pink" or "99% of people can't pass" it done said *"please try our game I payed for this ad"*

Ngl the idea of a game where you play as the villain sound pretty cool if executed properly

Imagine your name is actually Greg and you stumble upon Danny's channel for the first time

You're *mine* josh,
Not your *girlfriends*
Not your so called *pastors*
Not *gods*
Now and forever.
*ha ha ha*

my theory for the polysphere add is that they're hoping you fullscreen it and think the texts are from your ex, thereby making you click on the screen and sending you to the app store page.

I'm amazed how adds like these are legal. They are highly misleading.

“The sexiest rat”
*ratatoing flashbacks*

Nobody:
polysphere:
you are *MINE* not *GODS* not *your PASTORS* *_MINE JOSH_*

12:24 Is that the first thing you can think of when you hear disposable , a battery?
Me : Class D

So, I was listening while doing something else and let me explain.
Danny: "...standing and verbally insulting too? I'll play out the ad in it's entirety"
"Download vinted to give your loved clothes a second life"
You would not understand my very confusion before realising a REAL AD came on
also lucky danny, not demonitzed after all

Right so the ad has “🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞” and “Not children’s game! 🔞👿”. Then App Store be like “9+” uhhhhhhhhhh who do I believe???

I got an ad the other day that says "only swirly people can reach" and I still want to know what only swirly people are able to reach

Thank you Danny for the captions, I don't have hearing problems but I do like captions so I can clarify what I'm hearing. I'm sure people who need/want captions also greatly appreciated it

Game adds be like :
after reaching level 10000000 your legally allowed to breathe
🤠

Girlfriend: screaming and verbally abusing you
The background music: 👌💗💤😇

“I am the sexiest rat on youtube”
Weird flex but ok

5:06 “Distress the Damsel” actually sounds like a pretty cool name for a game where you play as the villain.

I love how he says, "this of course is another episode of..." in every video, yet the only series with multiple episodes (to my knowledge) is badads

Stranger: H-
Me: You’re not GOD’s! You’re not your SO-CALLED PASTOR’s! You’re MINE!

“how bad could the ads possibly be?”
*gets lorax flashbacks*

i've been binging his channel for about 2 hours now and i can confidently say i enjoy watching him talk about nothing for hours at a time💀

11:09
The plot of Crazy ex Girlfriend

Can we appreciate how it repeals said “not for kids 18+” but then he opens the App Store and it just says “9+”

I THINK I FIGURED OUT THE POLYGRAPH AD
ok so polygraph is one of those so-called "meditation" games, and i think the ad is trying to show that 'josh' is just staying calm and relaxed by playing the game even though all this shit is going on
but that's just a theory
*an ad theory*

11:02 I don't know if anyone has said this already, but it seems to be that what the ad is trying to say is that this game is something you can do while under extreme pressure, e.g. being scolded by a toxic ex. It's a horrible execution, but I understand what they're going for.

As a guy names Josh, I'm now affraid for my life

the biggest question that polysphere ad left me with is what did that guy take so long to solve the puzzle he got to the full image like three times during his ex’s monologue

“Red dress on tonight. Dancing in the dark, leveling up in the pale moonlight”

I actually used to play Hustle Castle when I was younger and the ads made me delete the game…

I can confirm, all our height goes into our boobs...every age- I mean level we get

Polysphere: You’re not God’s Josh, you’re mine.
Josh?: Wtf I’m just trying to solve this Iron Man puzzle :(

Ads: NOT CHILDREN’S GAME!!!
Game: 9+

4:12 tw: medieval torture in a little bit of detail
that is a form of medieval torture where a female (or a person with feminine reproductive genitalia) is placed on a sharp object (such as a wooden spear or a sword) and slowly pushed down until they are completely impaled. It can take weeks for the person to die as they are left on the spike/spear/sword until they have died
This may not be historically accurate as I'm writing this of by memory

"I wanna be the one putting the damsel in distress"
~every boy nowadays that isn't called Danny

my favorite quotes from this video:
5:06 “i would like to be distressing the damsel”
5:49 “you pervert, you rapscallion”
7:08 “something’s not adding up about this whole dragon birth thing”

as a woman, i can confirm we start off looking like soundcloud rappers and slowly age into jessica rabbit

i know what the "sexiest rat" refers to but if i didn't i would still just accept it as an accurate description of danny

“ *I* want to be the one putting the damsel in distress. *I* would like to be distressing the damsel.”
Me too, me too.

The worst part about the polysphere ad isn’t the texts, its not narration, it’s the fact that *he gets so close multiple times and then messes everything up*

By the way Danny, why did you kick Drew out. He is very sad

4:17 that used to be a form of torture for men and women a few hundred years ago :|

Awe, yes, my favorite insult, calling someone a sock.

Conspiracy theory: Danny is getting paid to make these vids by the company making the ads

The games characters look like something out of family guy

Me and my friend keep seeing this ad about “doing your math to increase your fellows” and i love it sm cause every time we find a new one we yell at eachother to do our math

My biggest fear: Not having enough material to make more videos of bad ads 😢

i saw that "gonna cry? piss your pants maybe?" and almost spat out my water. only real ones know

that wasn’t the ex’s voice, that was actually the games voice speaking to Josh

Distress the damsel would be a sick band name

I just want to point out, that his 6:23 is against the Geneva convention. Misuse of the Red Cross symbol.

Danny should do a video where he actually tries out these apps to see if they’re anything like the ads.

Episode: your father just died. 2💎
Plan a funeral 50💎
Cannibalize his dead body free !

I can do everything in the game?
Can I make eggs while juggling knives, fighting a giant toad with a crossbow, balancing two fiction novels on my head, kissing my girlfriend, watching a horror film, and taking questions from parliament about social issues?
And this is not a rhetorical question; answer me now, or I won't take out the recycle

Rise of kingdoms ads are the worst.
Here is the story of one as an example:
So, there is a guy, and his gf breaks up with him over ROK, cause hes too weak idk, and then he has to get more powerful so they could be together again. And he like chooses the vikings because they have like super op buffs, and the gf is with him again. That is not exactly what it is, it is just an example.

“I am your host Danny, the _sexiest rat_ on all of KRplus.”
If that’s not a mood I don’t know what is

After subscribing, you are legally allowed to change your name to Greg

2:14 hustle castle the horniest game on the Internet

I feel like these mobile game ads are going to use people's OCs in the ads, but not have them in the game, so they just advertise famous peoples OCs or faces to get clicks and downloads

No one:
Absolutely no one:
Poly sphere woman: yoU’Re MiNe jOsH

9:42 to 9:55 The Polly sphere game annoyed the shit outa me because every time they were close to finishing the level they would always mess it up like *UHHHHH uHhhhhhhHh* just stop it already

3:43 "How bad could the ads possibly be?" HOW BAD CAN I BE REFERENCE!?!? HOW BA-A-A-AD CA

That last ad, OMG. That whole bit had me laughing so hard I got stomach cramps!!! 🤣🤣

Danny: i've never been that close to a human before
*flashbacks to drew twerking on danny*

The polysphere ad sounds like the creator was goin thru somethin

the baseball ad is right cause its american tradition to name random sports football for no logical reason

3:50 I bumped into a ad about 18+ and I couldn’t skip it